Edge of Reason
by DevineM27
Summary: A mission gone wrong leads to counseling for John and Teyla


This was a response to a Challenge from the J/T Thread from this past summer(07/06).

**Edge of Reason**

Dr. Kate Heightmeyer observed the two personnel sitting across from her. Their body language was very telling. Teyla Emmagan sat erect with her knees and feet together and her hands resting calmly in her lap. The other occupant, Lt. Col John Sheppard, slouched back with his arms crossed and a smirk upon his face. Something was obviously wrong. The unique bond shared between Teyla and John was well known by all of Atlantis' personnel and to now see them so openly at odds was slightly disturbing. Normally, Kate didn't interfere in what she considered to be a lover's quarrel, but Dr. Weir had specifically requested this session. Elizabeth believed the dispute was caused by an incident that occurred on their last mission and she refused to let a rift damage the cohesiveness of her lead exploration team. Kate had already tried speaking to the individual members of the team separately; John had been cryptic, Teyla polite, but vague, and Ronon had merely shrugged. Oddly enough, it was her session with Rodney that had been the most forth coming. Although he whined incessantly about being shot in the leg, Rodney did mention that John and Teyla had had a disagreement on the return home. And considering how unobservant Rodney was, Kate was pretty sure that the use of the word 'disagreement' was the understatement of a lifetime.

Dr. Heightmeyer glanced at her watch and sighed. They'd been in session for nearly twenty minutes and yet neither one of them had said a word. Deciding it was time for a little tough love; Kate picked up her coffee mug and stood. John sat up.

"Are we done?"

"No, we're going to try something a little different."

John and Teyla shared a glance before both turned to look at the doctor. Teyla's brow knotted.

"Such as?"

Kate smiled.

"I am leaving, but before I go I want to lay down a few ground rules."

John grinned.

"So as soon as we're done 'talking', we can go?"

Kate sighed.

"No Colonel and if I find out that either of you left this room before I return I will tell Elizabeth and Carson that both of you are not fit for active duty and schedule you for two sessions a day for a minimum of thirty days."

John frowned and looked away.

"Now, as I was saying. Since it is obvious that the two of you are unwilling to discuss whatever caused this disagreement with me present, I will leave. But this issue must be resolved and the sooner you do so, the sooner I will be out of your hair. The rules are as follows: This room is your sanctuary. While in it you may say whatever you want. There is nothing and no one outside of this room. There is only John and Teyla. When you leave, whatever occurred in this room will stay in this room. Do you understand?"

Teyla and John nodded.

"Good. I shall return in forty minutes."

They watched as she walked away, the office door sliding closed behind her. John was off of the chaise in a heartbeat.

"Colonel!"

He turned to Teyla.

"I'm not leaving."

He held up his hand.

"And I don't want to talk about it."

Teyla sighed.

"It would seem we have no choice. Truthfully, I do not understand why you are so angry. It is not as if I have not done this before."

John leaned over her threateningly.

"Teyla, I _do not_ want to talk about it."

She glared at him.

"You can not stop me."

He gritted his teeth.

"_Teyla_…."

John backed away. His hands itched to shake her. He, himself, didn't understand his own anger, mainly because what she said was true. This was definitely not the first time she'd disregarded one of his orders and saved his life by doing so, but this was the closest he'd ever come to losing her. The mission to PGP-138 had been a disaster. Calling the mercenaries who lived in the local village murders would have been a kindness. They'd only tried to show themselves friendly in the hopes of locating the jumper, which had been cloaked. Once the ruse was up a gunfight had ensued. They'd made it to the tree line, but not before Rodney had been hit. Hoping to give Rodney, Ronon, and Teyla time to reach the jumper, John had ordered them to go on and broken off from the group. He wasn't sure if Teyla had gone to the jumper first or simply followed him into the woods. John had been content to sacrifice himself so that his team made it home safely. His capture had been inevitable, his death, he'd hoped would be quick, that was until he saw Teyla enter the clearing. Killing his two captors would not have been so difficult if her gun hadn't jammed. And helplessly watching Teyla engage in a battle to the death with a three hundred pound man, who easily stood over six feet and a half feet, was not on John's 'to do' list before he died. The idiot holding a gun to his head had found it exceedingly funny when his friend decided to lay a kiss on the woman he was slowing choking to death. Careless in his glee, he'd given John the chance he needed to knock him off of his feet and snap his neck. Armed and ready to kill, John stood just as Teyla sank a dagger into her assailant's neck. When he didn't let go, John added two bullets to his head. Finally, he dropped to the ground taking Teyla with him. John had had to roll the dead body off of Teyla because it was too heavy for her to do it alone. Together, they'd made a dash for the jumper, encountering Ronon alone the way. Once safely enroute to Atlantis, a white hot rage settled over John, that to this day, he still could not shake.

John turned to look at Teyla. His gaze focused on the green, blue and purple bruises that covered her neck and upper chest. John's brain nearly boiled with the fresh wave of anger that washed over him. He _didn't_ want to talk about it and the sooner everyone realized that, the better things would be.

"Colonel?"

Teyla's voice was raspy, weak. John didn't have to look at her neck to be reminded of how close he came to losing her; he only needed to hear her speak.

"John, why will you not talk to me?"

Lifting his gaze to her pleading eyes, John suddenly felt tired. He rubbed the palm of his hand against his forehead and sighed.

"Teyla please, just let it go. In a week or so everything will be back to normal."

She stood.

"I am not sorry for what I did."

John stiffened.

"If my dyi-."

He stepped forward, nearly losing his battle for control.

"Teyla. Sweetheart, I'm begging you, just be quiet."

She tilted her head.

"This is not like you."

John nearly swallowed his tongue.

"_What did I just say? Why won't you shut up? Just shut up!_"

Teyla's eyes widened.

"I do not take kin-."

John pushed Teyla back against the wall, cutting off her words with a kiss. At first she stood frozen, but when he lessened the pressure, she relaxed and slowly began to respond. John stopped fighting and gave in to the urges that had been hounding him for the last three days.

* * *

Dr. Heightmeyer watched the couple sitting on the chaise. Something had definitely changed. Judging from the mild disarray of Teyla's hair and red marks on John's neck, Kate could just imagine what that was. 

"Any progress?"

John glanced at Teyla, before leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees. "Yes."

Kate glanced at Teyla, who nodded.

"Good. I'd like to see you two again on Thursday, same time, but for now I'll tell Dr. Weir that I see no reason to take you off of active duty."

John sighed in relief.

"Thank you."

Teyla glanced at him and smiled.

"Okay, you're free to go."

Kate watched as they rose from the chaise. John waited for Teyla to precede him, following closely on her heels. They paused briefly in the corridor, sharing one last glance before turning and walking off in opposite directions.

* * *

John continued down the corridor, deep in thought. Dr. Heightmeyer was right about one thing; he needed to talk to someone. Nothing good could come from him walking around with so much anger bottled up inside. The door at the end of the hall slid open as he stepped through its threshold and closed again behind him. John sat on his bed and sighed. He didn't glance up as the doors slid open again. Soft footsteps crossed the room, slowing to a stop in front of him. John leaned forward, resting his head against Teyla's stomach. She ran her hand through his hair as he wrapped his arms around her waist. Slowly, the tension began to ease from John's body. 


End file.
